Sending & Receiving Messages

We all want to be heard and understood. But are we sending messages that can actually be received? 

How you share your message determines how and if it can be received by your partner. 

As you can see from this diagram, the way in your partner responds, depends a great deal on how your share your message. Typically, how you start off a conversation will determine how it will end. 

Notice what happens when you start off a conversation by blaming, criticizing, or judging your partner? They can't even hear what you're saying because they're too focused on defending themselves and going on the offense. Not only are you NOT being heard, but now you're under attack as well. 

Now notice what happens when you approach your partner in a calm and respectful manner. They'll likely be much more receptive to what you have to say. You want them to hear you because what you have to say is valid and important. Now they can actually hear you because there's no need for them to defend themselves from your attack. When you approach your partner in a loving way, there's a good chance they'll reciprocate. 

If you feel like your relationship is being poisoned by criticism, blame, defensiveness, judgement, and more - don't worry! There's an antidote for that: We Need The Antidote!

Reading about these skills is one thing, but implementing them is a whole other ballgame. Need help playing by the rules? I can assist! Check out my services for couples: Laura's Services For Couples